


but would anything matter if you're already dead?

by headfirstforiero



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Angst, Apocalypse, Death, Guns, If it helps I cried too, M/M, Zombies, im so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:21:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27006490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/headfirstforiero/pseuds/headfirstforiero
Summary: A zombie apocalypse oneshot. This was based around the lyrics of early sunsets.tw !! // angst, death, guns, weapons, zombies, nsfw.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Kudos: 15





	but would anything matter if you're already dead?

**Author's Note:**

> im rlly proud of this ngl

Frank listened to his boyfriend's soft breathing beside him, stroking his tattooed fingers through Gerard's bright red hair as he lay his head in Frank's lap, arms wrapped snugly around his waist. The couple had been situated on their bed for a few hours now, watching movies together and just savouring every moment that they could have together. 

They were finally happy. The boys had moved in together almost a week ago, trying to get away from all the bad memories, name calling and homophobia of their hometown.

Don't get them wrong - Frank and Gerard would always have a special place in their hearts for their small town in New Jersey - they just needed to get away from it for a while. They had been stuck in the same town since they were born, after all. Things were beginning to get a bit difficult there.

Frank had come home one night after taking a walk with his dog, trying to clear his mind. What he didn't realise was that it was a bad idea to leave his phone at home. His mother had been vacuuming his bedroom when she found it, and of course, instead of leaving it alone, she went through it.

She found things that she didn't like, like the conversation he had with Mikey about sexuality. More specifically, Frank's sexuality.

Frank's mom went downstairs almost immediately after reading it to show her husband. And Mr. Iero was absolutely furious. Their family was all Christian, you know, believing that love should only be shared between a man and a woman and all that. And they had certainly never wanted or expected to have raised a homosexual child.

They started screaming at Frank almost the second he had walked through the door. His father had pushed him to the ground violently, and the both of them told Frank how "disgusting" and "dirty" he was. That he was disrespectful for choosing to rebel against their beliefs and be a "revolting faggot". They spat and hit him and told him over and over again that he was a disappointment and that he was going to hell. He wasn't allowed to come back, either. Not until he 'decided to stop being a homosexual and snap out of this disgusting phase'. 

All because of his sexuality - a part of him that he was unable to change. Frank didn't understand why God apparently loved everyone and everything - he had created them, after all - but apparently hated anyone who was anything other than straight and cisgender. 

Even if they weren't amazing, his parents had been the ones to raise him, and Frank found it hard to believe that they had even kicked him out in the first place, let alone called him all those names and had actually hit him for it. They had never hit him. Ever. 

He found himself even beginning to believe that he really was everything his parents called him.

Frank walked through the dangerous streets that night, crying his eyes out and soaking wet from the heavy rain. The night was only merely illuminated by dim street lamps along the side of the road. 

There weren't many places Frank could go. He subconsciously walked himself to one of his friends' house, but Mikey wasn't even home that night.

He knocked lightly on the door, desperately hoping someone would answer. After one or two more knocks, Frank turned around, giving up and starting to walk back down the driveway, when he heard the door open and a familiar voice call his name.

Their eyes met, and Frank realised who it was that answered the door. Frank walked towards him and looked up through his wet eyelashes.

Although it was dark there was no light except for the faint glow coming from the house, Mikey's brother, Gerard, almost instantly noticed Frank's tear stained cheeks and awkward limp. His eyes almost grew to the size of the fucking moon.

He picked Frank up bridal-style to carry him inside, and carefully laid him on the couch to tend to the bruises and bleeding wounds covering his body.

Frank always kind of liked Gerard. As in like liked, not to be a weird school-girl or anything. And the way Gerard helped him and did everything in his power to make sure he was okay made his stomach do a flip. 

Gerard didn't need to do what he did - he could have left him out on the streets, beaten and bleeding. But he didn't. He actually gave a shit about him - even if it really was a platonic feeling on his part - and that thought alone made Frank's insides melt.

Frank's doubts were put to rest soon, though. Gerard kissed him for the first time that night. It was soft, but filled with care and emotion, and something that they had both been craving for a long time. Gerard helped him for the next few days so that he was able to get back on his feet again. 

In a way, Gerard saved his life. 

They've been together ever since. Not at first, though - they had only kissed - but eventually, it happened.

Gerard loved Frank with all of his heart and nothing could ever change the way he felt. And Frank felt exactly the same way.

As soon as they graduated from that shithole that people call high school and said their goodbyes to their friends and Gerard's family, the couple left with their already packed bags and gathered all the money that they'd saved from shitty jobs to start fresh and rent an apartment in a nearby town. It was far from perfect, but it was good enough for the both of them. 

One of the worst things about the place was that the walls were very thin, and Gerard and Frank aren't exactly quiet when they're making love to one another. They would hear banging and yelling from the walls beside them from people telling them to shut the fuck up, and being Frank and Gerard, they'd usually just respond by moaning louder.

It's funny how quickly lives can change.

They hadn't even gone a week into living together. But now everything was chaos. Everything outside had been abandoned. Ruined. Forgotten. Everyone was either hiding or had already been bitten.

They didn't think that a zombie apocalypse would ever actually be a real thing. It was just something you see in movies. That's what everyone thought. Nobody in their right mind would have seriously believed in a zombie apocalypse, but it happened.

Gerard and Frank knew they wouldn't be able to stay much longer. They'd made a list of things to take with them. It was mainly the essentials - blankets, pillows, toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, Frank's guitar, food, clothes, shoes, toilet paper, a first aid kit and a baseball bat - just in case - plus a few other things.

Neither of them had any clue how long they were going to have to hide, so they brought as much of everything as they could and hoped that it would last them long enough.

They were planning to stay at Gerard's grandmother's old house because it was the only safe place they could think of. And it was empty. It was just outside of Belleville, and it took an hour or two to drive there from where Frank and Gerard were staying. 

The drive was long and uneventful. Frank stared out the window for most of the ride, linking his fingers with Gerard's at some point as they drove. 

When they got there it was almost lunchtime. Frank opened his door on the passenger's side and took in his surroundings. 

Clouded sunlight was shining through the leaves and branches of the tall birch trees. The leaves and grass covering the ground crunched underneath his feet as he moved to get a better view. There was a small clearing, and a small wooden house with a big black door and wind chimes hanging from the verandah. He watched a swing that was hanging from the roof of the verandah sway back and forth in the wind. The breeze carried a few falling leaves.

It was a beautiful place, but it was fucking freezing.

He shivered, crossing his arms over his chest and rubbing his clothed forearms to gain some warmth. He jumped a little when he felt arms snake around his waist and Gerard's warm chest press into his back, but then he relaxed and smiled slightly. Gerard nuzzled his face against the back of Frank's neck. Frank put his hands over Gerard's.

"This place is really pretty." Frank stated, still looking around.

"Not as pretty as you," Gerard placed a kiss on the back of Frank's neck. "But yeah, I agree."

Frank chuckled and shook his head.

"We should bring some of our stuff inside, and then we could maybe have some lunch. Does that sound good?" Frank asked, turning his head towards Gerard a little more. Gerard let out a muffled hum in approval.

Gerard walked around Frank until he was beside him and they walked behind their car and opened the back to grab a couple of the suitcases and bags. They made a few trips back and forth from the car to the front verandah, just sitting all of their bags there so that they would be easier to bring inside when everything was out of the car. 

Frank brought the last bag up to the door and saw Gerard sitting on the swing waiting for him. He stood up when Frank put the last bag down and pulled Frank towards him by the waist. He kissed Frank's cold nose, and then moved upwards to kiss his forehead. Frank squished his face into the warmth of Gerard's chest, trying to warm his face.

"Let's go inside, pumpkin. You're really cold."

"Please," Frank groaned. "I can't even feel my toes anymore."

Gerard smiled at Frank before turning his attention to the door and pulling his keys out of his back pocket. He fiddled with them for a few seconds before pulling an old silver one out of the chain and shoving it into the keyhole. He twisted the door handle and pushed the door open with his forearm.

It was dusty and dark inside. Gerard felt around the wall for the light switch and flicked it. A dull bulb flickered to life and illuminated the living room, just as Frank sneezed.

Most of the furniture in the room had dusty sheets draped over it. There was a couch and a wooden coffee table sitting in front of the fireplace. To the right of the room, there was a bench that connected the living room to a small kitchen, which consisted of only a fridge, a gas oven and a few cupboards. Frank noticed a closet next to him as he walked in and a bathroom that was situated behind the kitchen. There was another room at the far end of the house, which Frank assumed was the bedroom. 

He walked over to one of the shelves that was screwed into the wall and looked at the items that were there. It held a small porcelain doll, a framed photograph, a few old stacked books and a Russian doll. Frank's eyes lingered on the photograph for a minute, realising that the two small boys were Mikey and Gerard when they were little. Frank felt a small smile tug at the corners of his lips. They looked so cute. There was an older woman standing with them in the photograph too. She was pretty.

"Frank? Could you come help me bring these inside?" Gerard called from the doorway. Frank turned back to his boyfriend to help him with the bags.

When they were finally bringing everything inside, they collapsed onto the sheet-covered couch in the middle of the room, giggling a little when the dust particles jumped upwards off the couch. 

"Lunch?" Gerard asked. Frank nodded and they both stood again to make some sandwiches. 

• • •

The next day went by fairly quickly. Frank spent the day washing white sheets, cleaning and dusting, trying to tidy up the place. Gerard had helped for a little while, but Frank told him it was fine and that he could do something else if he wanted. 

Gerard was laying on the couch in front of the warm fireplace, sketching. Frank watched him from the kitchen. He was so beautiful when he was concentrating on his art. Frank loved how his dark eyebrows moved into a little frown and his pink tongue poked out of the side of his mouth. To Frank, Gerard was the most gorgeous person in the world, and he made sure to let him know every day through actions or words. 

"You don't need to stare, baby." Gerard broke the comfortable silence, catching Frank off guard and making him jump. Gerard looked up from his work, smirking.

"Sorry."

Gerard shook his head. "Don't apologise," He said kindly and stretched his arms out. "Come here. I'm really cold."

"Gee, you have the fire right there." Frank chuckled. Gerard pushed his lips outwards in a pout.

"But I'm cold." He argued. 

Frank gave in and sat the cloth he was using down on the bench, making his way around the corner to join his boyfriend on the couch. Gerard moved his legs so that Frank could cuddle up next to him. Once Frank was sat down, Gerard threw his arms around his small body and cuddled into his side. Frank rested his arm around Gerard's back and pulled him closer. They laced their fingers together and Frank used his thumb to stroke soft circles onto the back of Gerard's hand. 

"Are you warm now, sugar?" Frank questioned.

"Hmm, no. Could you warm me more?"

"Gerard, I'm tiny. I can't cuddle you any more than I already am." He giggled.

Gerard moved so that he was sitting up, but still being cuddled by Frank. He looked up into Frank's mesmerising hazel eyes, then leaned in to feel his thin, pink lips against his own. Their lips glided together softly at first, but then Gerard slowly moved his hand to the back of Frank's neck and pulled him closer so that the kiss was harder. Frank brought his hands to rest on Gerard's waist and ran his tongue along Gerard's bottom lip, subtly asking for entrance, which Gerard accepted eagerly and almost instantly. Their tongues danced together for another few heated seconds before they pulled away for air.

"Mmm," Gerard licked his lips and the corners of his lips twitched upwards into a grin. "I think I know how you can warm me up." 

He grabbed Frank's shoulders and began to push him down on the couch, and lifted his leg over Frank's hips so that he was straddling him.

"Yeah? And how are you going to do that?" Frank asked innocently, his hands still on Gerard's waist. 

Gerard leaned down so that his face was as close as it could get to Frank's without touching, and ground his hips down harshly into Frank's crotch. He could feel Frank's warm breath on his face hitch and let out a shaky breath. Gerard smirked. Frank just looked into his eyes again and lifted his face up a little to meet Gerard's lips. The kiss was passionate and immediately introduced tongue, but it was somehow still soft and made Frank feel butterflies.

Gerard pulled his tongue out of Frank's mouth and started to make a trail of wet kisses down his chin and neck. Frank stroked Gerard's waist and hips, starting to pull up his shirt. Gerard poked his tongue out of his mouth and licked across his neck, up to a spot just underneath his ear, a spot that he knew drove Frank crazy. He used his tongue to lick a circle before attaching his lips to his skin and beginning to suck. Frank let his mouth drop open and felt his dick twitch in his jeans, a quiet groan erupting from the back of his throat. 

Once Gerard felt happy with the new mark he had made on his love, he kissed back up to Frank's lips. Gerard whined into the kiss as Frank pulled Gerard's hips down again. Their lips kept working together in slow movements as they both rutted against each other, moaning at the friction.

Frank trailed his hands over the hem of Gerard's shirt and began to pull it up slightly. Gerard pulled away from the kiss for a second to take it off, discarding the rest of his clothes along with it and helping his boyfriend unbutton his shirt. Frank held his bottom lip between his teeth and looked at the boy on top of him with dark eyes. 

"Fuck, I'm never going to get used to how gorgeous you are when you're naked." 

Gerard blushed at the comment and hid his face in the crook of the shorter boy's neck, taking the opportunity to make another mark there. Frank ran his tattooed hands through Gerard's fire truck red locks, tugging and listening to how the redhead groaned when he did that. 

At this point Frank was the only one who was still wearing clothes - he was still in his boxers - but they weren't going to be on for very much longer anyway. Gerard crept down Frank's body, keeping their eyes locked as he began to mouth at his dick through his boxers. Frank moaned brokenly and his head fell back onto the armrest behind him. Gerard had hooked his fingers into the waistband and was beginning to pull the last piece of clothing away, wanting to see all of Frank.

He had pulled the boxers right down past Frank's ankles and tossed them haphazardly to the corner of the room, trying not to set their clothing on fire. 

Gerard looked back up to Frank, gazing into his darkened eyes, before pressing light kisses over his thighs, gradually getting closer to his crotch. Frank reached down to stroke his hair lovingly.

The redhead stopped at Frank's hips, placing one more kiss there before poking out his tongue and licking a long stripe up his erection from the base to the tip. Frank kept his eyes on him as he moaned, leaving his mouth agape and tugging on his boyfriend's scarlet locks. Gerard smiled again, then took the tip into his mouth, sucking gently.

"A-ah," Frank threw his head back and couldn't help the little kick his hips gave. 

Bracing himself with his arms on either side of Frank's hips, Gerard unhurriedly took more of him into his mouth, basking in the feeling of Frank's grip tightening in his hair. He began moving his mouth up and down, keeping heated eye contact until Frank squeezed his eyes shut from the pleasure and turned his head away slightly. He kept his hand threaded through the strands of Gerard's hair though, tugging just like he knew he loved.

Gerard moaned around Frank's cock, sending vibrations of pleasure over his body, the heat making his skin tingle. His hips bucked upwards on their own accord, and his dick hit the back of Gerard's throat. It made him gag and his eyes watered a little, but then he took all of Frank into his mouth at once. His nose touched the dark curls above the base and he ran his tongue along the underside of his dick, leaving Frank moaning even louder and grasping the couch cushions with the hand that wasn't already occupied with pulling Gerard's hair. 

He took Frank down his throat one more time before pulling off, swirling his tongue over the tip and collecting the precum that had been leaking heavily down his throat. Gerard licked his swollen lips, then crawled up Frank's body to capture his in another kiss, straddling him once again. Gerard would never get used to the way his love's wet lips felt on his own, sliding together in their own unorganized rhythm, their flushed bodies pressed close against each other.

The redhead felt Frank run three of his fingers across the tip above his chin, right below where their lips were meeting. He pulled away from the kiss, breathing heavily against Frank's pink lips as he watched him slowly move his fingers into Gerard's mouth. He took them in eagerly, gazing into his boyfriend's eyes again as he sucked, coating them generously with his saliva. Frank let his mouth hang open in awe as he watched Gerard lap at his digits hungrily, feeling his dick twitch in anticipation. He wrapped his other hand around Gerard's dick, to which he moaned around Frank's fingers. 

Once he thought they were slicked up enough, Frank removed his fingers from his boyfriend's mouth. Gerard immediately leant back down for another kiss, muffling the high moans he was emitting as Frank moved his hand slowly over his cock and thumbed at the slit. Frank took his hand away completely, instead using it to grip his waist. 

Frank reached behind Gerard and started teasing his entrance with one of his fingers, earning a quiet gasp from Gerard. He held Frank’s face between his hands, kissing him hard, feeling his finger carefully slide into him. He moaned into Frank’s mouth.

Frank placed open-mouthed kisses over Gerard’s jaw, moving his finger in and out of Gerard a few more times before adding a second. This one hurt a little more than the last time, but it wasn’t that bad yet, so Gerard just dug his nails into the sides of Frank’s neck a little bit. Gerard reached his finger between them to pump Frank at the same speed as his fingers were moving inside of him, sucking and nipping at his sensitive neck. Frank added the third finger, and Gerard hissed at the pain that came with the stretch. Frank kissed him below his ear and the side of his neck, trying to distract him from the pain long enough that it could turn into pleasure. 

Gerard moaned against his neck as his fingertips barely brushed against his sweet spot. He whined when Frank pulled out his fingers, and Frank brushed a piece of hair behind his ear and kissed him to assure him that he would get what he wanted soon enough. 

He kissed Frank again as he lifted himself onto his knees, bracing himself with his hands on Frank’s shoulders. Both men moaned as Gerard slid himself down after lining the tip of Frank’s cock to his entrance. They stilled for a few moments once Frank was all the way inside, letting Gerard adjust. He rocked his hips slowly against Frank, getting used to the stretch and the feeling of being filled. 

Frank moaned brokenly, his eyebrows drawing together as the warm feeling in his stomach grew more. “So beautiful, sugar. So breathtaking.”

When he was ready, Gerard began moving his hips, creating a slow rhythm. He moaned as he bounced, Frank stroking his thighs as he rode him. He wrapped his fingers around Gerard’s dick, pumping him slowly in time with their movements. 

“Frankie,” Gerard whined, kissing Frank’s jaw again. 

He was trying to speed himself up but his legs were shaking. Frank noticed this, and watched Gerard’s jaw drop in pleasure as he pulled Gerard’s hips down at the same time as he thrusted upwards. Gerard swore, gripping Frank’s shoulders tightly as his breathing became heavier.

Frank smirked at Gerard’s reaction and thrust up again, harder, pushing against that special bundle of nerves inside him. He cried out, throwing his head back and digging his nails into Frank’s chest as the pleasure rocked through him. 

“Please, Frankie, ah-again, harder, please,” Gerard whimpered, rolling his hips over Frank’s.

He quickly complied to his husband’s wishes, thrusting up again and again as Gerard cried out, letting out breathy moans. Frank then took it the next step further, making thrusts into Gerard that were quick, shallow, and hard. Frank's thighs were burning, but the pleasure was much more amplified, so he didn't really care.

Gerard was almost screaming with pleasure. He was sweating, his skin flushed. Each press against his prostate was drawing him closer and closer to his release. He was moaning loudly, getting higher in pitch.

“F-Fuck, Frank, c-close,” He gasped, and Frank started pounding into Gerard at an almost animalistic pace. 

He was moaning so loud that, if they had neighbors, they would be able to hear him. It didn’t take very long for Gerard to finish, spilling onto Frank’s stomach, crying out as the pleasure hit him all at once.

Gerard kept bouncing on Frank’s cock, helping him towards his orgasm, even though he was becoming oversensitive.

He kind of liked that feeling anyway.

Frank moaned lowly as Gerard rocked his hips and bounced, holding his waist tightly. “Close, fuck,”

Gerard leaned down to lick and bite just below Frank’s ear, moaning softly at the overstimulation. He nibbled on his ear lobe and then whispered, “Come for me.”

And that was it, Frank lost it, his back arching off the couch and as he came inside Gerard. Gerard moved his hips and kissed Frank softly, working him through his orgasm before pulling off, making a face at the hot liquid running down his thigh. 

After picking up a shirt and wiping them both off, Frank pulled a thin blanket that was hanging over the edge of the couch on top of them. He made a noise of disbelief as Gerard pushed his face against Frank’s chest.

“There was a blanket there the whole time, Gee, what the fuck?”

Gerard just shrugged lazily, smiling against his chest. “I was cold and horny. It was a good idea, don’t deny it.”

Frank huffed playfully. “I wouldn’t turn down sex with you, it's fucking amazing.” He kissed the top of Gerard’s head lovingly.

Gerard giggled, moving his head so that his chin was resting on Frank’s chest and he could look up at him. “I love you.”

“I love you too, sugar,” He spoke softly, and Gerard laid his head back down on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

• • •

"Pumpkin, can you go get some more firewood for me? There's not enough inside, and the fire is burning out. It's cold."

Frank looked up from his book before closing and setting it down. 

"Of course, sugar," Frank stood up, then walked over to where Gerard was kneeling in front of the fireplace, and bent over to place a quick kiss on the top of his head with his hand resting on his shoulder. "I'll be back in a minute."

It was much colder outside. Frank really regretted not wearing a coat or something over his thin hoodie.

Ignoring the chills running over his skin, he walked around to the side of the house to fetch the firewood. The sky was light grey, and Frank could hear small animals in the trees behind him. 

He smiled to himself. Nature was so pretty. He was sure he'd take Gerard back here again when this whole 'zombie' thing was being handled. 

There were three chunks of the tree that he'd cut up in his arms, and didn't have much more room left to hold any more wood, so he started to walk back towards the house. He silently hoped this was going to be enough, at least for a little while.

More rustling came from the bushes behind him, and he slowly turned. He froze in place when he saw what it was.

It was a fucking zombie.

Its skin was an unhealthy light grey colour, kind of like the sky at the moment. The skin that should have been covering its jaw was torn off, dangling under its chin. Its eyes were completely blank - no iris or pupil, just white. Its clothes were torn and hanging from its dry, dead skin. 

Frank wanted to gag at the sight, but he knew that wouldn't help anything, so he swallowed it back down.

It was facing away from him, but it was getting close. Too close.

He crouched slowly and placed the wood on the ground, keeping his eyes locked on the zombie. He kept his gaze fixed to it, although he didn't want to look at it at all, because he needed to know when it figured out he was there and wanted to fucking eat his brains or guts or whatever.

Frank really wanted to keep his internal organs inside his body.

He glanced away for a second, standing up and tiptoeing through the fallen leaves and dead grass to the axe that was laying beside the wood. 

Snap.

Fuck.

Frank froze in place, praying that it hadn't heard the stick snap beneath his foot. But, of course, Frank wasn't that lucky, and the zombie instantly turned at the sound, groaning when they locked eyes. 

Before the zombie could do anything, Frank lunged for the axe, gripping the handle with both of his hands and leaping upwards to face it. It was pretty much right next to him, maybe a few metres away. 

"I thought zombies were meant to be fucking slow," Frank cursed to himself, making the zombie groan louder and take another step.

Without even thinking, Frank squeezed his eyes shut - he didn't want to see it's brains everywhere - and brought the axe down with great force.

It missed completely.

When he opened his eyes, the zombie was nowhere in his sight.

"What the fuck," Frank whispered, turning his head.

There was another groan behind him then, and Frank tried to turn around, but the zombie was too fast. It had its hands over Frank's shoulders, keeping him in place, as it leant over slightly to sink its teeth into the skin showing on his neck.

Frank screamed, using all the strength he had in him to pull himself away. He still had the axe in his hand, so he swung wildly at the zombie. It was able to dodge the first few times, but then Frank hit it in the neck harshly with a loud cry, and its head fell from its neck, only barely hanging on with the last piece of its leathery skin. It fell to the ground, unmoving. 

"Frank, I heard screaming, is everything oka-" 

Gerard had come out through the front door, stopping his sentence abruptly as his eyes landed on Frank, who was breathing heavily with an axe in his hand, and then drifted to the unmoving corpse on the ground.

"Pumpkin?" He asked wearily, his voice cracking. 

Frank stepped over the body, then ran up to the verandah and fell into his boyfriend's arms. Tears were falling from his eyes, he was letting out all the emotions he had just been too shocked to feel properly.

He felt himself being pulled away from the warm embrace as Gerard felt the sobs rack through his small body.

Frank could tell that Gerard was about to say something, something to comfort him maybe, but he lost his words when he caught sight of the deep bite on Frank's neck, oozing blood slowly and the skin around it beginning to turn an ugly greenish-purple colour.

"Frankie, I-" Gerard choked on a sob, feeling tears begin to run down his cheeks too.

Gerard quickly pulled Frank inside, into their bedroom, and set him down on the bed. Frank felt guilty as he walked past the dying fire in the living room, realising that he had forgotten to bring the firewood with him. Now Gerard would be cold.

"I'm sorry," Frank whispered before he could stop himself, his head dropping down to look at his lap.

There was a sharp pain in his neck when he moved it, and he winced.

Gerard sat down beside him, pulling him into his warm embrace and stroking his hair comfortingly. "Frank, please don't be sorry. I should be sorry, I made you go out there-"

"You didn't make me do anything, I wanted to get it for you. I'm sorry I didn't." Frank interrupted.

"It's okay, baby. I don't fucking care about the wood right now." Gerard sobbed. "I just want you to be okay."

Then it all hit Frank at once. He had just been bitten by a zombie. No one had come up with a cure yet.

He was going to turn into one of them.

Frank turned his head to Gerard, who was sobbing and rambling about how sorry he was, and kissed him with everything he had in him - love, passion, sadness, and even guilt - shutting him up for a minute.

Their foreheads rested together when they pulled away, but neither of them opened their eyes.

"Baby," Frank started, tears in his eyes again. "I need you to do something for me, okay?"

Gerard's hands shook as Frank moved to grab them. "Y-yeah?"

Frank's face was like a waterfall at this point, and he didn't think it would be stopping anytime soon. 

"I-," Frank sniffled. "I packed a pistol in my suitcase, just in case we came across a zombie or something. In case I needed to protect you."

They kept their fingers laced together, squeezing each other's hands lightly. Frank took a deep breath, unable to meet Gerard's gaze.

"I need you to kill me before I turn."

Gerard abruptly pulled away from Frank, staring at him in shock. He shook his head frantically, the tears in his eyes clouding his vision. He couldn't shoot Frank. He couldn't. 

"N-no," He choked on his own words, still shaking his head and looking at Frank desperately. "Please, p-pumpkin, I can't- I won't, there has to be another way-" 

"There isn't another way."

And just like that Gerard was sobbing again, mumbling 'no' against Frank's shoulder as he held him close, rubbing his eyes like it would make everything go away, like he would wake up from this horrible nightmare at any moment. 

"I'm so sorry." Frank repeated. He himself was sobbing against Gerard just as hard, if not more. 

He felt so guilty, like he was forced into leaving his baby because he wasn't quick enough to kill the fucking zombie outside. If he had just maybe turned around before the zombie could act, maybe things would have been different. Maybe he wouldn't be sitting here, asking his boyfriend to shoot him.

Once they had been sitting there crying for a few minutes, Frank pulled back to reach over to the other side of the bed, grabbing the gun. Gerard kept his arms wrapped around his middle, tightening them as he realised what he was doing and sobbing impossibly harder against Frank. 

The sobs were making his body tremble, and Frank placed the pistol beside them to wrap his arms around the redhead again, running his fingers through his hair. Usually when Gerard was upset he would whisper comforting things into his ears, telling him everything was going to be okay, but could he really do that now, when both of them knew that wasn't the truth?

Frank was having an internal battle, not wanting Gerard to have to do it at all or have to put that kind of pressure on him, but also knowing this was the only way Gerard would have a chance at safety. If Gerard didn't shoot him, Frank would turn into one of them, and then bite Gerard, and then they would both be fucked.

Wordlessly, Frank grabbed the gun again, opening Gerard's quivering hand in his and carefully resting it in his palm, closing his fingers over it. Gerard shook his head against his chest again, but didn't drop the gun.

He didn't want to do it.

But he knew it was what he had to do.

Eyes still blurred by the tears streaming down his swollen face, he pulled away from Frank once again, getting up off the bed and letting him stand beside him. 

They just sat there staring at each other for a few moments, drinking in as much of each other as they possibly could, trying to remember each and every detail, even through the tears.

Frank was the first to make a move, quickly wrapping his arms around his love's middle and soaking his shirt even more.

"I love you so so much, I need you to know that." Frank began. "I never got to buy a good house with you, propose to you, or marry you, or have children with you, or anything like that. I'll always be so sorry that I never got the chance to give you any of that, because you deserve to have that. You deserve the whole world and more. You are my everything, Gee, and if I could give you everything, I know that I would. Please don't cry over me for too long, please move on and live a happy life, let someone give you everything that I wasn't able to."

"I'll never love anyone but you. You are mine, and I am yours. I don't want it any other way." Gerard spoke up, squeezing Frank in his arms.

He bent his head down to nudge at the side of Frank's face in an attempt to make him meet his eyes. 

When he did, Gerard lifted his hands to his face and held him there before kissing him hard.

Passionate, loving, sad, angry, guilty, desperate.

A goodbye.

Gerard wanted it to go on forever, he didn't want to lose this man, and he knew that when he pulled away from him that's exactly what was going to happen.

But Frank didn't have much time left, the grayish-blue tone was spreading from his neck to his jaw, and it wasn't going to be long before it reached his brain, and he turned.

They pulled away for the last time.

Gerard was shaking so badly that the pistol in his hands was basically vibrating. Frank took a few steps back, leaning against the blank wall. 

A click broke the deafening silence in the room when Gerard cocked the gun, pointing it at Frank's head. Frank gulped audibly and took another deep breath.

"I love you."

As much as he tried to, he couldn't hide the shakiness in his voice as he spoke those three words.

Those three words that he had used so many other times with Gerard.

Those three words that never grew old.

Those three words that made him feel warm inside.

Those three words that he meant with all of his being every time he used them.

Those three words that he would have used forever if he could.

Those three words that would be his last.

"I love you too." Was all Gerard said, his chest aching, as his heart shattered to pieces, knowing this was the last time he would see Frank alive. 

His hazel eyes that he woke up to every morning, his gorgeous smile that greeted him, his stupid grin that teased him, his loving embrace that held him close, his warm kisses that kept him sane, his safe arms that comforted him, his shoulder length brown hair that Gerard could wrap around his fingers so easily.

The things Gerard would never get to experience again.

Taking another deep breath, he pulled the trigger.


End file.
